Time seem to pass very slowly these few days, don’t seem to have the mood to do anything at all. WHY!? I slept at 2am yesterday, and I kept waking up again. Woke up at 4am, 5am, 6am, 6.30am, 6.45am, 7am, 8am, 8.15am. Body felt like it’s going to tear apart. I am so tired….
Having light breakfast, eating the leftover porridge I cooked last night. Will be heading off to office soon once I am done. Thought of writing a bit.
Caryn will be leaving back to UK soon, so soon, to start her work life there. Wished I could do the same. Somehow, this place is . . . . not so sacred anymore.
Friends were asking me, why want to move so suddenly, and where will you be moving ?
I don’t know actually, I am still searching for a place. Just felt that somethings, some things we just have to let go. . .
Let the good and bad memories be carved in our mind, once in a while, changing places might help. I guess, I have to move on. I have fallen very far apart from everything around me. Lost track of what I’ve did in January, lost track of what I did last year and the years before. Don’t make life so meaningless. Make it colorful, meaningful. Tell yourself today is a better day, tell yourself you have to be happy today. That’s what Alicia told me last night.
No hard trying, I told myself, but it’s not going to be easy. It’s Tuesday Already, Wednesday will be heading to Connaught with Caryn, since she said it’s been 10 years since she went to pasar, okay, before you leave, I shall bring you there :), Thursday will be watching Shio’s resital / performance in UCSI, Friday will be driving down to Malacca, Saturday, Sunday night will be back. Monday will start my work as a Zombie.
Started getting busy again in office. Workload coming in non stop, but I still want to write a little, for friend’s request. I won’t do stupid things like what I did last year. I don’t want to make more wounds on my body which will remind me more and hurt me more.
Marie said I should go out more often, join some youth camp? She said I am lost, I don’t have any direction. My heart is empty although I am doing things right now. There’s no meaning in it. Or maybe I should give it a try…
Yn invited me to go do some charity work with her next time. Kinda look forward.
And to my friends and cousins, Congratulations on your SPM/STPM results. Hope you’ll have a good road ahead. All the best for your future undertakings. Enjoy life while you are still young.
Sometimes, I feel very old, mixing with the sisters, but yeah, I am the eldest among them. Sometimes I find it hard to mix in. Haha! But having them around is very enjoyable. Appreciate all the time we spent together. Guess I have to stop here. bye